This article is based off my handwritten notes, which I took as I attended a church sermon on this topic in Apr 2024.

Text: Luke 2:36-38

Five biggest concerns for singles, regardless of age / status (e.g; never married, widowed, divorced):

1. Self-worth / identity: Is there something wrong with me, not being able to find a partner? Or having been divorced, was it my fault?
2. Sexual purity / holiness: We live in a world where which is depraved, and values like sexual purity goes down. How do we maintain sexual purity amidst our single-hood?
3. Sense of security: Financial stability, retirement and care of elderly parents, housing and self-care for ourselves in aged years, we may not be able to physically take care of ourselves
4. Social / emotional well-being: Peers getting married and having kids, feeling of loneliness, social isolation / stigma of being single: do I want to acknowledge I’m in that state that I need help?
5. Shifting worldviews: Especially in first world country, we should pursue career first, not necessary to get married. Then we come to a ping where it becomes harder to find a life partner, also because we have lived so long independently, it may be hard to find someone to come alongside with us. Idea of independence: don’t be bogged down with spouse and children, can cohabit with each other without strings attached if not happy just move in (friends with benefits).

• These are issues that may not go away, simply because we get married
• Let’s debunk these myths: marriage is not a silver bullet that will resolve all these issues
• We first need to deal with each of them in our lives and with God, separately
• In fact when we marry, we may have new problems / challenges, and may not always have a perfect life

Two important principles (1 Cor 7:32-35):

• Written by Paul, on time spent with the Lord
• Undivided attention: how one is single and can be devoted to pleasing God only, and when married they will have to take care of their spouse / children
• Undistracted devotion: in our single-hood, we can give God our undistracted devotion / attention, and to following him
• We need to take these two principles even when married, to ensure we still give God our full attention
• Even in our singleness, it may not be easy to do these, as we can be distracted / occupied with so many other things
• But our choice should be to give God our undivided attention and devotion

Keys to dedicated singleness (Luke 2:36-38):

1. We need to be free of shame, regret, and bitterness
2. Staying in the temple
3. Serving the Lord wholeheartedly
4. Praying and fasting
5. Giving thanks to God
6. Speaking about God to everyone

We need to be free of shame, regret, and bitterness:

• Anna was married for only seven years, then her husband died
• In their culture back then, marriage usually occurred during their teens
• In so many years of her single-hood, she could have chose to feel short-handed by God, even more that no brother from her husband side would take her as part of the Jewish tradition
• However, she was not bitter even her husband died
• And we should not too: even if we may have missed to age to find or partner, or feeling not up to standard and shame because we are “left on the shelf”, or our partner has left us is it our fault, or why was my spouse taken from me (regret, bitterness)
• Instead, let’s live in the freedom of the Lord
• Free so we don’t have to get angry with God, or bitter about ourselves

Staying in the temple:

• Anna was in the presence of God, and being with the people of God
• We may not have a spouse her, but God calls us to be in His presence, and be with the people of God always
• They don’t always have to be physically present with you, or they just reply our text immediately, or like our Instagram posts online
• We should come for more classes in church
• And when we find ourselves sitting alone without friends, then first make the effort to be a friend: talk to someone else and encourage someone
• Stop waiting for community to come to you, start being the community and build your own community

Serving the Lord wholeheartedly:

• Alluded by Paul, as discussed above
• It’s not about serving more / less, but serving wholeheartedly
• If you have ten ministries and complaining each week, that’s not serving wholeheartedly

Praying and fasting:

• Anna was praying and fasting everyday
• There is an anointing / attraction we get from others, when we live a life of godly pursuit
• We pursue God with all our hearts, and our character transforms, God’s glory emanates from within us, and helps us to be more attractive
• And we people are attracted to you, we point that person to Jesus

Giving thanks to God:

• Singapore’s culture may be to complain even about small things
• But let’s not adopt that culture, in our Christian lives
• Instead, we thank God sincerely from our hearts, even that we are still single, and how we can dedicate our lives fully to Him

Speaking about God to everyone:

• Anna always talked about God to people in her lives: specially those visiting the temple
• We should too

• We need these six godly perspectives to address the five concerns of being single, instead of letting them overwhelm us
• Singles are also complete in God